


It Just Is

by coffeeincluded



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Canonical Character Death, Discussion of Afterlife, Gen, Gender-Neutral My Unit | Byleth, Grief/Mourning, Nonbinary My Unit | Byleth, Pre-Timeskip | Academy Phase (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), not part of my au
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-04
Updated: 2020-03-04
Packaged: 2021-02-23 09:23:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23009275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coffeeincluded/pseuds/coffeeincluded
Summary: The dead went to the Goddess. Everyone in Fodlan knows that. Everyone in Fodlan was taught that before they even knew the meaning of the words. But the Goddess was with them, and where were the dead? Where were their mother and father?
Relationships: Jeralt Reus Eisner & My Unit | Byleth, My Unit | Byleth & Sothis
Comments: 2
Kudos: 50
Collections: Those Who Drabble in the Dark





	It Just Is

**Author's Note:**

> This week's Felannie Server drabble prompt is on the afterlife of Fodlan, which isn't really touched upon in-game!
> 
> I've had this idea bouncing around in my head for a while but it was surprisingly tricky to get down, especially at the end. I hope you all enjoy regardless!

The funeral for Jeralt should have brought some measure of comfort, of closure. Some sort of balm to their pain, something to dull the edges and soothe the worst of the sting. 

It did precisely none of that. That chasm of grief inside Byleth remained, yawning and open and terrible. It was a pit of clawing agony with no bottom, just the pain of feeling their father go heavy and limp in her arms over and over and  _ over _ again. The way their father quietly smiled as they cried for the first time, tears melting into the rain. It was the worst pain Byleth had ever felt in their entire life, and all the more raw because they had never felt much of anything before this year. How could anybody stand it? Edelgard, Petra, Dimitri, Ashe, Ingrid, Felix, Dedue, Lysithea, Raphael...goddess, there were so many, and that knowledge tore at them anew. How were their students able to keep going after their own pain and loss?!

“One day at a time, and some better than others,” Sothis said, soft, gentle, and above their shoulder like always. “I’m sorry, I can’t give you any better advice.”

It was okay. At least Sothis was honest, at least Sothis felt their pain better than anyone else. And to be honest, if they heard one more person say something like, “He’s with the Goddess now,” they were going to scream. 

Besides, was that even true? Jeralt kept them from the church and scripture, but some things were so ubiquitous in society that they filtered through. Good people basked in the light of the Goddess when they died. Bad people burned in the eternal flames like those at Ailell. Some people wandered, adrift and lost. 

But was any of that even real? 

Sothis, who bore the Goddess’s name, who gave Byleth the power to turn back time and keep their students safe, who was likely some aspect of the Goddess herself, was not up in the heavens but here, in their head. And if the Goddess was in their head, and the dead went to be with the Goddess, then where were the dead? Where were their mom and dad?!

“I...I don’t know. They’re not with me. Byleth, I’m sorry.”

It wasn’t Sothis’s fault, and Sothis wasn’t the one who lied. But if the dead didn’t rest with the Goddess, then where did they go? Anywhere? Did they just...vanish, like a soap bubble on a needle? 

Sothis said nothing, but the connection went both ways, and Byleth could feel Sothis’s wordless cry of  _ I don’t know! _

Either way, their father was  _ gone _ . Byleth didn’t want their father gone, Byleth wanted their father here. With them, sparring and drinking and fishing and seeing all the different parts of Fodlan. They would give anything to have their father back, to not feel this pain anymore. 

And now the tone in Sothis’s voice changed. “Anything? Even yourself? Even your students?”

No. Never. How could she even ask that?!

But even in their recoiled horror, Byleth already knew.

_ The dead are dead. _ (and was that Sothis, or them?)  _ You can’t help them. But here and now, you are alive. And, for whatever it's worth, we are here for you.  _

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading and I hope you all enjoyed--see you around soon! And yes, I'm working on the next chapter.


End file.
